So...my life has been a little chaotic. School has entered a short reprieve (HALLELUJAH), but time still finds a way to be filled. I'm currently in the process of landing an additional job, finding a place to live, and stepping into some very large shoes as my ward's relief society president. Also, when I'm not working like a madwoman, I get to sometimes watch my friend's niece who is experiencing a case of the awful, dreadful, down right rotten and oh so terrible two's. She's so adorable you could explode, so it makes being angry and upset nearly impossible. However, today she certainly gave me a run for my money. After alternating endless, mind-numbing episodes of Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood and Paw Patrol, temper tantrums, role playing with beanie babies, more tantrums, playing human jungle gym, playing outside, and an impromptu food fight, I was finally given a break...a bathroom break.
When I gazed into the mirror, I was taken aback. To put it kindly, I resembled a homeless person who'd been sleeping under a bridge for a month. It was 6 pm and if I wanted any shred of my sanity, I needed a shower and I needed it now. I turned on the water and began to relax when I heard it- the patter of tiny footsteps running down the hallway. Next, pounding on the door. My heart froze. I stopped breathing. She found me. Her tiny hands wormed their way under the crack. Soon she began screaming over and over and over at the top of her lungs " WHAT you DOING?! WHAT YOU DOING? WHAT ARE YOOU DOOOIN?! WHAAAATT AARE YOOOOU DOOOIN?!" She began to listen to the curious behavior behind the door and began to connect the dots that I was attempting to flee from the vise like grip of her pudgy hands. And that I was now experiencing her favorite past time- a bath. "Bath?! I WANT BATH! I WANT BAAAAAAAFFF! " Tears began to flow, pounding intensified on the other side of the door panel, shrill shrieks began to shake the hallway. There wasn't anywhere else to run. I was doomed. Trapped. Left there in an awful, embarrassing state to rot and die. I didn't know whether or not to have a heart attack or laugh hysterically. Soon, a brave knight decided to give the toddler dragon a hot dog and get her to go to sleep and I was able to continue my bathroom break in peace.
Needless to say, I haven't been that afraid to use a bathroom since the Piccadilly Circus tube station toilets in January which I'm sure had various strains of hepatitis and maybe a strain of the Ebola virus.
It was an adventure. Here is just a small, exciting excerpt of my life this week. More to come. Be wary of tyrannical toddlers who happen to be drawn to water. Wishing you luck in your life and in the bathroom now and always. Xo-Heather
