And now the chapter closes...

Well my friends, its looking like a portion of my life as I know it here in st. geezy is changing yet again. Tomorrow is my last day working for the devishly adorable Robertson boys, I got two new jobs- one working at a troubled youth facility and another as a part-time nanny for an adorable family, and I'm moving out of the Christensen's before school starts at the end of August. I'm not exactly sure where I am moving yet, but its time for me to move on. Right now, it is looking like I'm going to move in with Evie and I'll probably live there for a few months until I finally leave for my mission. I've been so blessed to have these new opportunities and I am so grateful for the opportunity to start earning some money to save up. It just makes me wonder how exactly I'm supposed to proceed from this point, what exactly the Lord has in store for me, and the lessons I've yet to learn during the short duration I'll live here. I guess I need to keep trusting, praying, working and reaching out to those around me. I'm just getting impatient. All I want is to be out there, serving fully, on my mission. I can serve here, work and be happy, but I just want to be on the mission. Does anyone have a cure for impatience? Don't they sell a remedy at Wal-mart? If they do, you should totally hook me up. Anywho... Adios, readers! Peace, Love and all that jazz.

Swiss Bank

Apparently, I'm one of these. Well, when it comes to matters of the heart. Impenetrable, closed, hard to crack- some require retinal scans, dna tests and a urine sample, plus a criminal background check, a talent show, 10 years of community service (enjoying it would be a definite plus, none of that court mandated crap), a PhD, Nobel Peace Prize, plus or minus an estate and a private jet, not to mention a sparkling personality, a love and respect for your mother (not in and Oedipus way- no incest, please)and an insatiable urge to go to Africa and adopt all the little children. Apparently those expectations are just too unrealistic! What does it take to find men like that?!


But in all seriousness. Today I was told the reason I'm second rate, over looked, never picked, just the friend, is because my heart happens to be sealed up in one of these vaults. That's the reason why I've never been able to experience someone actually liking me (you know, a normal person, who doesn't belong in a psycho ward). I have been so blessed to have so many people love and care for me and be surrounded by wonderful friends. I don't want to sound ungrateful or discredit any influence these remarkable people have had on my life and my heart, but I know that there is more.
For once in my life, I want someone to love the person that I am, to cherish me. I'm tired of being overlooked, tossed aside, and forgotten in pursuit of something bigger and better. I'm not one to just pine and wait around for some guy to grow a spine and come crawling to me. I don't want to do that anymore. I have too many things to do, too many hands to lift, mouths to feed, burdens to ease. I don't want to fritter away my time like a sad, mopey, flouncy, fragile woman waiting for her knight in shining armor to rescue her from her knitting. That's just not who I am. I need a man who is going to dream and accomplish things with me, who will inspire me to be the best I can possibly be, who will kiss my forehead frequently, comfort and hold me when I need a shoulder to cry on, who will surprise me with tickets to Disneyland, a joke, flowers or peck on the cheek now and again. I want a man who knows why he is here, who keeps his Father in Heaven at the forefront of his mind and keeps him first in his life, who recognizes the importance and beauty of people, who has a sense of humor, can keep up with my ridiculous brain, take risks and understands that the important things usually aren't the most convenient things. I am a woman who knows exactly what she wants. What she needs. I don't need every Tom, Dick and Harry poking around in this vault to see if they may be slightly interested in the precious things stored therein. That place, is for someone who will acknowledge and appreciate that special, sacred place, who is willing to do anything to get there. Until I meet that person, I am going to continue to open my heart to people- trust them, love them as best as I can and create relationships with friends. I guess its all I can do.

But sometimes I just don't understand it. I'm not a drop dead gorgeous, a size zero, quiet, a floosey, or a temptress by any means, but I'm still awesome in my own way. Why can't guys see that? Am I intimidating? Scary? Ridiculous? Help? Figuring this out may determine whether or not I can get to the Celestial Kingdom. Anyway, if you made it through all of that, I owe you a tootsie pop. Congratulations! Thanks for putting up with my rant. I am not responsible for the sudden contraction of cataracts, tufts or gray hair or slight wrinkles that may have appeared while reading this discourse.(and if so, i'll give you a tube of denture cream along with your tootsie pop) Keep it real, readers. The Gospel of Jesus Christ is true! Remember it and apply it in your life. Love you all! Wishing you all the best. Until next time, friends, ciao!

America, You Rock.

Parades, Most incredible Fireworks EVER, Freedom, Barbecues,Family. What more could you ask for? Our country is incredible. The End. Oh, and of course, If you're reading this, Aunt America, You rock my world too! Love you!